I tried to think of a clever opening to this entry but I decided it wasn't necessary. I think her letter speaks for itself.
I just read your book. It was the most difficult thing I have ever done next to turning my back on the one person I believed in, my ex husband, the monster that hurt you so long ago. I'm sure it still
feels like it was yesterday, and I'm sorry. I have thought about you and your family almost daily over the last 19.5 years. I have prayed, cried, worried, asked about you. We have most likely talked to many of the same people in the "system" over the years.
I have often thought about trying to find you but didn't want to add to your pain. How would I even begin that conversation? When I read that article in Sundays paper it just made me sick. That reporter was just so utterly clueless.
If meeting me is still something you are interested in, just say so. I have always wanted to know that somehow you found God's peace in your life. I am so sorry for the hell he put you through, I wish I could have recognized it in him, prevented it, found him the help he so needed, before he hurt you. I wish I had known the demons he had hidden.
If I don't hear from you I will certainly understand. All in God's time.
I have often thought about trying to find you but didn't want to add to your pain. How would I even begin that conversation? When I read that article in Sundays paper it just made me sick. That reporter was just so utterly clueless.
If meeting me is still something you are interested in, just say so. I have always wanted to know that somehow you found God's peace in your life. I am so sorry for the hell he put you through, I wish I could have recognized it in him, prevented it, found him the help he so needed, before he hurt you. I wish I had known the demons he had hidden.
If I don't hear from you I will certainly understand. All in God's time.
I haven't responded to her yet but I will...soon.
Jurney Eve
It was kind of her to reach out to you. Given what the paper stated with *Mr. Smith's past, I don't understand how the signs weren't there for her to see. I guess when we 'love' somebody, we can be ignorant...deaf...blind...to their downfalls.......downfalls is an understated description for the monster this creep is.
ReplyDeleteThe creep he was....is....and always will be.
You'll know what to say, and when it's time for you to say it.
XOXO
I think she wants to talk to you for herself. She seems to feel a lot of guilt. I guess if I were you I would think about what I wanted to get from talking to her. What are you looking for or hoping for in the conversations. She is hoping to be forgiven. But what are you hoping for? Will this help you? Will it help to bring peace and healing or will it bring more pain? I don't know. I will pray for you.
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